A Heart's Farewell

The silence between us has been deafening, a heavy weight that presses down on my chest. I remember how it all began, my anger simmering just beneath the surface, quiet yet potent. Instead of confronting you, I chose the silent treatment, believing that withdrawing would somehow communicate my hurt. I thought if I stayed quiet, you would understand the depth of my feelings and come to me with an apology. But in reality, my silence only built walls between us, walls that grew taller with each passing day.

During those weeks apart, I replayed our last moments together in my mind like a broken record. I wanted to scream, to cry, to let you know how much your actions had hurt me. But instead, I bottled it all up, thinking that time would heal everything. Each day felt like a battle against my own pride. I didn’t want to be the first to reach out; it felt like admitting defeat. But as the days turned into weeks, I realized that my silence was doing more harm than good.

I missed you, more than I ever thought possible. The laughter we shared felt like a distant memory, and the warmth of your presence was replaced by an aching void. I longed for the moments when we could talk about anything and everything when our connection felt effortless and real. The truth was, my anger had faded into something deeper: a profound sense of loss for what we once had.

As I sat alone with my thoughts one evening, memories flooded back. do you remember the poem I wrote for you? The one that spilled from my heart on that magical New Year’s night when we first began our journey together? It was a promise of love and dreams shared under the stars, a moment so full of hope and possibility. And then there was the letter you wrote me, filled with your own dreams and fears, words that made me feel seen and cherished. Those moments were the foundation of our love, moments that now felt so distant yet so vital to who we are together.

Most of my first experiences, the first time I held hands with someone special, the first time I dared to share my deepest thoughts, were with you. You were my first in so many ways: my first love, my first confidant, my first partner in adventure. Those memories are etched in my heart like delicate brushstrokes on canvas, vibrant yet tinged with sadness as I realize how far apart we have drifted.

When we finally began to talk again, it became painfully clear that things had changed irrevocably between us. The connection we once shared felt strained under the weight of unresolved feelings and lingering resentment. Each conversation seemed to circle back to the same misunderstandings, and no matter how desperately I wanted to bridge the gap between us, it felt like we were speaking different languages again.

The realization hit me hard: despite my longing to return to those beautiful moments, the laughter, the poetry, the dreams, we were no longer on the same path. My heart ached with every word exchanged as I understood that love alone wasn’t enough to mend what had been broken.

In those quiet moments of reflection, I knew what needed to be done. With tears streaming down my face, I whispered goodbye, not just to you but to the dreams we once shared. It was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made, but deep down, I understood that sometimes love means letting go.

As I walked away from what we had built together, it felt like leaving a part of myself behind. Yet I knew it was time to move on, to find healing in new beginnings rather than clinging desperately to what could have been. My heart still aches for you; it always will, but now it's time for me to find peace within myself and embrace whatever comes next without you by my side.

Love,

Arika

...

Postingan lainnya

Arika

Arika, dengan rambut hitam nya yang panjang dan terawat, terlihat indah ketika ditiup oleh angin yang berhembus. Matanya yang meskipun berwarna gelap namun selalu memancarkan cahaya yang berbinar. Setiap hari selalu membagi keceriaannya ke orang lain. Senyumannya yang begitu menular jika kau bertemu dengannya. Suaranya yang indah seperti nyanyian siren yang menghipnotis. Pakaiannya yang selalu rapi, seakan-akan tidak pernah kotor. She's just perfect. Like a fallen angel. How can a human be this gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, stunning, heavenly, all those words belong to her. Benar-benar that pinterest girl, if you know what i mean. ... Aku terdiam duduk di kasurku dengan laptop sebagai satu-satunya sumber cahaya di kamarku. Dari laptop itu keluar nyanyian lagu, lagu yang kutujukan hanya kepadanya. Kacau. Pikiranku tidak karuan. Hatiku penuh oleh seseorang yang sangat kusayangi. Seseorang yang namanya selalu kutunggu terpampang di layar handphone ku. Jariku perlahan meng...

The Letter From The Writer (5)

In the tapestry of our school days, your presence is the most vibrant thread, weaving through every moment and making the ordinary extraordinary. From stolen glances in the classroom to the electric touch of our fingers as we pass notes, every shared heartbeat creates a melody only our hearts can hear. In the quiet corners of the library, our whispered conversations create a world of our own, a sanctuary where the outside noise fades away, leaving only the symphony of our connection. Your laughter in the hallways is the sweetest melody, and the way your eyes meet mine across the crowded cafeteria sends shivers down my spine. As we navigate the complexities of assignments and exams, I find comfort in the knowledge that you are my partner in this academic journey. Our late-night study sessions turn into stolen moments of shared glances and subtle touches, and in those stolen seconds, time stands still. The classrooms may be filled with lectures, but my focus is always drawn to you—your i...

The Night We Started It All (4)

Beneath the twinkle of New Year's eve, A heart, brave but shy, finds its reprieve. In the echo of laughter, and the countdown's cheer, A poem unfurls, whispered to a man so dear. Oh, gentle star in the midnight sky, In your presence, my spirits soar high. With each passing second, a chance to confess, A New Year's wish, in the heart's address. Through the fireworks' dance and the joyous crowd, I speak in verses, soft and proud. In the realm of possibilities, let our paths align, A hopeful New Year, where your hand fits in mine. May the moments ahead be a story untold, Where sentiments deepen, and emotions unfold. As the calendar turns, let our connection grow, In this New Year's glow, may true feelings show. May our journey together be a cherished grace. Kami berdiri diatas gedung tertinggi di kota. Menatap langit seperti lukisan abstrak bintang-bintang. Hawa dinginnya malam menusuk tubuh, namun dihadang oleh pelukan dari tangannya. Pelukan begitu hangat dan n...

Fall Silent (1)

Bel kelas sudah berbunyi tanda jam pelajaran fisika telah selesai. Selanjutnya kami akan mempelajari matematika, pelajaran yang aku tunggu-tunggu. Aku menyukai matematika sejak SD. Menurutku, matematika mengajarkan kita bahwa ada banyak jalan yang dapat dilalui untuk sampai ke tujuan yang kita inginkan. Contoh, 2 + 2 = 4 namun 1 + 3 juga 4. Hal yang sangat simpel, namun sangat berarti jika kau memahaminya. Itulah mengapa aku menyukai pelajaran ini. Guru menyuruh kami untuk membentuk kelompok untuk mempresentasikan materi minggu depan. Sebuah kebetulan sekali, aku satu kelompok dengan Arika. Gadis itu, tak hanya cantik tetapi juga cerdas. Bahkan banyak yang ingin satu kelompok dengannya. Membuatku berpikir apakah semesta berada di pihakku? Apakah ini pertanda bahwa kami memang ditakdirkan untuk bersama? Astaga, hariku takkan pernah bisa kabur dari gadis itu. Sungguh manusia yang sempurna. Matanya yang hitam kecoklatan itu.. Oh, how i fell in love with her. Too deep. Sa...

Haidar

Lelaki itu, astaga. Haidar. Nama yang sangat indah. Seindah wajahnya yang begitu tampan dan charming . Matanya sebiru lautan, sangat tajam, membuatku tenggelam sangat jauh setiap kali aku melihatnya. Rambutnya yang selalu acak-acakan, namun tetap terlihat rapi disaat yang sama. Dengan mendengar namanya saja, jantungku bisa mempercepat detakannya seperti sudah diprogram otomatis setiap kalinya. Lelaki itu, yang berhasil meluluhkan hatiku selama ini. Lelaki itu, yang selalu mengisi pikiranku setiap hari. Lelaki itu, yang selalu ku temui di mimpi-mimpi indahku. Oh, he's just too perfect. Yang aku inginkan sekarang hanyalah dia. Dia yang dapat mengisi hari-hari ku. Dia yang dapat menjadi sandaran ketika aku lelah, ketika aku sedih, dan aku akan melakukan hal yang sama padanya. Biarkanlah kita saling melengkapi satu sama lain. But, is it possible? Is it me he's looking for? Dia begitu sempurna. Aku sadar aku tak mungkin bisa memilikinya. Tapi, ayolah.. Would you...

The Sunset (2)

Dear diary, I met a boy He is the illusion of which i dream. He is a beautiful afterthought of all the words of love left unspoken. Loving him is exactly like breathing. How can i stop? His presence, so strange and wonderful, seemed to fill the room and press against me. I didn’t think I’d ever sleep again. The first time I heard you laugh, I only wanted to say funny things, and so you would always be laughing. You know what happens to chocolate when you leave it out in the sun? I’m that unfortunate chocolate and you, you are the laughing sun. For this reason, I am offering myself to you not as a martyr or some selfless fool, but as a self-indulgent moth who actively pursues the light without much fear for the flame. The moth who revels in the heat and declares: “Burn me.” I dream of going to places with you and waking up with you everyday. Someday, I wish all of these hopes would come true. To be your friend was all I ever wanted; to be your lover was all I ever dream...

Lurus.

Cari Blog Ini